Weird Beard

I’ve been letting the old beard grow

It’s been coming in so weird though

Soft darkness of earlier days

Now replaced by burlier grays

My face is now a patchwork quilt

Some places thick and over-built

While other spaces are quite bare

And seemingly bereft of hair

My wife dislikes my new old look

Refusing now to clean or cook

But that’s not all, just as I’d feared:

No sex until I shave my beard