How are things back in the sweet old 7th Dimension? I really miss you sweetie! I can’t wait until my tour of duty is up here on this awful place! Darn the Inter-Dimensional Council for sending me here to observe these barbarians!
(Barbarian is one of the new Earth terms I’ve learned. It means basically the same thing as Glak – senselessly violent and ignorant)
These Earth people are basically all insane. There are a few nice people among them, but they never have a chance to make a difference in the world. The people with real power here are usually wealthy, politically-connected, selfish and untrustworthy.
(Their ‘wealth’ is based on that crazy monetary/trade system I told you about, where all the wrong things are over-valued and the truly valuable things are overlooked)
One glaring difference I’ve noticed between home and here is the odd twist in how the famous gained their notoriety. For instance, you know Adolf Hitler, our famous leader of People For Peace? In this dimension he was a tyrannical warmonger! Can you believe that? He’s hated and despised the world over for his atrocious acts of war! I think it’s the inherent violence here that’s responsible, but I’ll leave that to the IDC to figure out.
Another weird turn-around here: Michael Jordan played BASKETBALL! Isn’t that hilarious? Imagine old President Jordan, noble statesman and dignitary, playing a sport! Of course, here he’s a bit younger than there, and I suppose it wouldn’t have been such a stretch 30 years ago. But the image is still funny.
Sports are extremely popular here for some reason, probably just another extension of their warring nature. They treat athletes like royalty here and pay them incredible amounts of money to play their games. (Meanwhile, most educators and laborers are paid very little for their valuable contributions. Is that a sign of a sick society or what?)
They love conflict here. I can’t imagine how many centuries it will take for their brains to develop far enough to stop such foolishness and finally get along with each other. These people will fight over anything – resources, ideological differences, their imaginary boundary lines. I’ve even seen people argue and fight over consumer goods when there was not a sufficient supply. Back home they’d be insisting that the other person take the last one.
I’ve got to be going now, my dearest. I’ll be counting the hours until I can hop back through my inter-dimensional transport unit and blip back to be with you once more! Give my love to our offspring!
Your loving life-partner,