Followers

May 28, 2010

Claudia (my first 55)

***

(This is a much-shortened version of a story I started working on recently)



College started soon and Josh needed a place to stay.

A newspaper ad led him to a three-bedroom apartment.

Ben showed him the room next to Claudia’s.  (Claudia?) She wasn’t home.

At midnight she kicked in his door...

'She' was Ben in a dress, wielding a sharp knife.

(Josh never did make it to class)



***

14 comments:

  1. John (@bookdreamer)May 28, 2010 at 9:52 AM

    Don't you hate noisy neighbours! my 55 here

    ReplyDelete
  2. anthonynorthMay 28, 2010 at 10:07 AM

    And I can understand why. Nice one.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Alice AudreyMay 28, 2010 at 10:50 AM

    Yikes! You say the apartment was converted from part of the Bate's Motel?

    ReplyDelete
  4. RNSANEMay 28, 2010 at 11:33 AM

    Very interesting 55 and, I must say, it definitely grabs your attention in a few short words.

    I love your bright, bold header with its electric blue flower.


    My poetry book - Life's Journey by Carmen Henesy - is out on Amazon
    ( Poems about the things that have been important to me in my journey through life, some humorous, some sad, some that may have meaning to you as well )
    http://www.amazon.com/Lifes-Journey-1-Carmen-Henesy/dp/1451547366/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1274652997&sr=1-1

    ReplyDelete
  5. Brian MillerMay 28, 2010 at 11:59 AM

    oh my great story...would love to see the expanded version. welcome to 55s as well!

    my 55 is up!

    ReplyDelete
  6. BubbaMay 28, 2010 at 12:17 PM

    Thanks for all the kind words. I've got a longer, more detailed, but (as of yet) still incomplete version posted on my Live Space page. This 55 version is kind of a spoiler, since it sums up the basic direction I was thinking of heading with the story.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Monkey ManMay 28, 2010 at 1:29 PM

    First stab at a 55 and you hit the mark. My 55 is HERE .

    ReplyDelete
  8. PattiKenMay 28, 2010 at 6:43 PM

    Welcome to 55! Great job with your first entry. Come back and give us more.

    ReplyDelete
  9. moondustwriterMay 28, 2010 at 7:34 PM

    great 55
    those college apartments - never know what kinda room mate you'll get

    ReplyDelete
  10. BubbaMay 28, 2010 at 7:53 PM

    Thank you! I've already got my next 55 in the works.

    ReplyDelete
  11. G-ManMay 28, 2010 at 9:55 PM

    Well Eric...
    This was a bit 'Dark'...
    Dark and EXCELLENT!!
    Great Job Brother, I hope you had fun doing this.
    Thanks for playing, thanks for visiting, see ya next Friday, and have a Kick Ass Week-End...G

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  12. BubbaMay 29, 2010 at 8:30 AM

    Likewise, G-Man! (Three day weekends ROCK!) See ya next Friday!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Linda Bob Grifins Korbetis HallMay 31, 2010 at 2:50 PM

    handsome 55.
    thanks for playing!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Lulda CasadagaJune 1, 2010 at 11:42 AM

    Hot diggity dog...this 1st 55 is a gang buster! :)
    Come by and visit mine sometime!!

    ReplyDelete

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